WHY ARE YOU STILL AWAKE?
Q: Dude, it's 1 PM. Don't I deserve to be up now?
A: No, you should be asleep at all times.
Q: Yo, it's 10:07, not 10 PM. Why can't you get it right?
A: We show just the hours, not the minutes, seconds, or milliseconds. Deal with it.
Q: Why are you yelling at me?
A: Because you never listen.
Q: Why does your site suck so much?
A: Because we'd rather sleep than make you happy.
Q: Why haven't you answered my stupid question?
A: Because it's a stupid question, or because you haven't sent it yet. Our email is whyareyoustillawake@gmail.com
A: No, you should be asleep at all times.
Q: Yo, it's 10:07, not 10 PM. Why can't you get it right?
A: We show just the hours, not the minutes, seconds, or milliseconds. Deal with it.
Q: Why are you yelling at me?
A: Because you never listen.
Q: Why does your site suck so much?
A: Because we'd rather sleep than make you happy.
Q: Why haven't you answered my stupid question?
A: Because it's a stupid question, or because you haven't sent it yet. Our email is whyareyoustillawake@gmail.com
WALL OF EXCUSES
— I accidentally made myself nocturnal. Wake up at 4 or 5 PM, fall asleep at 9 next day. 8 AM
— what is this? 6 PM
— I just looked up how high I could from without breaking my legs and I have work in 6 hours :) 11 PM
— Because i fucking can 10 AM
— yeah im gonna go with methylamphetamine too 9 PM
— Uh it is to early 10 PM
— Because I'm deciding whether I should kill Parthurnaax or not.(Skyrim) 11 PM
— im bonding with my girlfriend 2 AM
— Wow this weed is good NOON
— it's the middle of the day 1 PM
— that fish reminded me of her..... 2 AM
— Sabrina nellie 8 PM
— OOOh, a computer..... *opens* MIDNIGHT
— None of your bsnz 1 AM
— because im fullbof 15kinds of pills to hrlp my tonsilitus ok? now im bored 8 PM
— dis bitch got me 50 shades of fucked up 2 AM
— Because I took a nap by accident 10 PM
— I'm sorry ;-; 1 AM
— A combination of a positive excited anticipation for tomorrow and procrastinating bed time fused with an inner turmoil of sorts 5 AM
— I DONT KNOW!! *Breaks down in tears* I DONT WANNA BE AWAKE! 2 AM
— My friend is over and after reading some bad fanfiction together she stole my eraser and I had to get my revenge somehow 1 AM
— y should i sleep? 11 PM
— HOLY FUCK ITS THAT FUCKING LATE ALREADY!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? SHITBALLS!!!! MIDNIGHT
— bullshit reasons. we can do better. life is worth more than whatever moronic distractions take up the time i should be resting my brain/body. 1 AM
— because i am a stupid human being im sorry 5 AM
— This newsfeed is irresistible. 1 AM
— Addicted to porn. Now the sun is up. 7 AM
— I wanted to cry so I forced myself, it didn't work. 9 PM
— I dont feel so good... MIDNIGHT
— Will there be a scrollbar? Will answers simply disappear? I'm tossing and turning as my mind turns over all the possibilities.
— I accidentally made myself nocturnal. Wake up at 4 or 5 PM, fall asleep at 9 next day. 8 AM
— what is this? 6 PM
— I just looked up how high I could from without breaking my legs and I have work in 6 hours :) 11 PM
— Because i fucking can 10 AM
— yeah im gonna go with methylamphetamine too 9 PM
— Uh it is to early 10 PM
— Because I'm deciding whether I should kill Parthurnaax or not.(Skyrim) 11 PM
— im bonding with my girlfriend 2 AM
— Wow this weed is good NOON
— it's the middle of the day 1 PM
— that fish reminded me of her..... 2 AM
— Sabrina nellie 8 PM
— OOOh, a computer..... *opens* MIDNIGHT
— None of your bsnz 1 AM
— because im fullbof 15kinds of pills to hrlp my tonsilitus ok? now im bored 8 PM
— dis bitch got me 50 shades of fucked up 2 AM
— Because I took a nap by accident 10 PM
— I'm sorry ;-; 1 AM
— A combination of a positive excited anticipation for tomorrow and procrastinating bed time fused with an inner turmoil of sorts 5 AM
— I DONT KNOW!! *Breaks down in tears* I DONT WANNA BE AWAKE! 2 AM
— My friend is over and after reading some bad fanfiction together she stole my eraser and I had to get my revenge somehow 1 AM
— y should i sleep? 11 PM
— HOLY FUCK ITS THAT FUCKING LATE ALREADY!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? SHITBALLS!!!! MIDNIGHT
— bullshit reasons. we can do better. life is worth more than whatever moronic distractions take up the time i should be resting my brain/body. 1 AM
— because i am a stupid human being im sorry 5 AM
— This newsfeed is irresistible. 1 AM
— Addicted to porn. Now the sun is up. 7 AM
— I wanted to cry so I forced myself, it didn't work. 9 PM
— I dont feel so good... MIDNIGHT
— Will there be a scrollbar? Will answers simply disappear? I'm tossing and turning as my mind turns over all the possibilities.