WHY ARE YOU STILL AWAKE?
Q: Dude, it's 1 PM. Don't I deserve to be up now?
A: No, you should be asleep at all times.
Q: Yo, it's 10:07, not 10 PM. Why can't you get it right?
A: We show just the hours, not the minutes, seconds, or milliseconds. Deal with it.
Q: Why are you yelling at me?
A: Because you never listen.
Q: Why does your site suck so much?
A: Because we'd rather sleep than make you happy.
Q: Why haven't you answered my stupid question?
A: Because it's a stupid question, or because you haven't sent it yet. Our email is whyareyoustillawake@gmail.com
A: No, you should be asleep at all times.
Q: Yo, it's 10:07, not 10 PM. Why can't you get it right?
A: We show just the hours, not the minutes, seconds, or milliseconds. Deal with it.
Q: Why are you yelling at me?
A: Because you never listen.
Q: Why does your site suck so much?
A: Because we'd rather sleep than make you happy.
Q: Why haven't you answered my stupid question?
A: Because it's a stupid question, or because you haven't sent it yet. Our email is whyareyoustillawake@gmail.com
WALL OF EXCUSES
— i n t e r n e t 2 AM
— NO, YOU DO NOT NEED HELP! JUST STAY AWAKE! Sincerely your brain. 2 AM
— pls kill me 2 AM
— just help me 2 AM
— why is it always the same thing 11 PM
— girls man, fuck. 4 months planning and you cancel only to say "i don't want to be mean" i'm just so done, 26/7/16 11 PM
— because my new phone comes in soon and im pumped 1 AM
— You lost the game. 4 AM
— POKEMON GO 3 AM
— I tend to be awake in the daytime. 2 PM
— My friend is over and after reading some bad fanfiction together she stole my eraser and I had to get my revenge somehow 1 AM
— I'm at my friend's house and a friendly sinfic read turned to her trying to use the eraser I stole to erase me 1 AM
— it's hot as Devil's balls in wool drawz that's why. I'm evaporating through the night! 2 AM
— Because It's freaking full moon right in front of my window and my blinds are broken MIDNIGHT
— It's a weekend 4 PM
— i hear a deer outside and keep imagining its ex machina and shes gonna murder me 1 AM
— Because I came downstairs for the baby monitor 2 hours ago. MIDNIGHT
— HOLY FUCK ITS THAT FUCKING LATE ALREADY!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? SHITBALLS!!!! MIDNIGHT
— and its not late too 10 PM
— i dont fucking know 10 PM
— i wanna hang myself 3 AM
— I just ate 3 bags of popcorn, and since each one weighs 2 ounces, then that's like half a pound of popcorn, so if I do the math I'm about .4% popcorn 1 AM
— Pokmon GO!!!! MIDNIGHT
— cause the DEEP WEB 4 AM
— Movies? Mrs. Doubtfire is a classic... (And maybe the Internet) MIDNIGHT
— YouTube, anime, Facebook 2 AM
— It's 6 AM. Why am I here? 6 AM
— back to basics 6 PM
— what am i supposed to say 5 PM
— fuck, this girl is just so hard to talk to 5 PM
MOAR!
— i n t e r n e t 2 AM
— NO, YOU DO NOT NEED HELP! JUST STAY AWAKE! Sincerely your brain. 2 AM
— pls kill me 2 AM
— just help me 2 AM
— why is it always the same thing 11 PM
— girls man, fuck. 4 months planning and you cancel only to say "i don't want to be mean" i'm just so done, 26/7/16 11 PM
— because my new phone comes in soon and im pumped 1 AM
— You lost the game. 4 AM
— POKEMON GO 3 AM
— I tend to be awake in the daytime. 2 PM
— My friend is over and after reading some bad fanfiction together she stole my eraser and I had to get my revenge somehow 1 AM
— I'm at my friend's house and a friendly sinfic read turned to her trying to use the eraser I stole to erase me 1 AM
— it's hot as Devil's balls in wool drawz that's why. I'm evaporating through the night! 2 AM
— Because It's freaking full moon right in front of my window and my blinds are broken MIDNIGHT
— It's a weekend 4 PM
— i hear a deer outside and keep imagining its ex machina and shes gonna murder me 1 AM
— Because I came downstairs for the baby monitor 2 hours ago. MIDNIGHT
— HOLY FUCK ITS THAT FUCKING LATE ALREADY!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? SHITBALLS!!!! MIDNIGHT
— and its not late too 10 PM
— i dont fucking know 10 PM
— i wanna hang myself 3 AM
— I just ate 3 bags of popcorn, and since each one weighs 2 ounces, then that's like half a pound of popcorn, so if I do the math I'm about .4% popcorn 1 AM
— Pokmon GO!!!! MIDNIGHT
— cause the DEEP WEB 4 AM
— Movies? Mrs. Doubtfire is a classic... (And maybe the Internet) MIDNIGHT
— YouTube, anime, Facebook 2 AM
— It's 6 AM. Why am I here? 6 AM
— back to basics 6 PM
— what am i supposed to say 5 PM
— fuck, this girl is just so hard to talk to 5 PM
MOAR!